Dear couples who overshare on social media,
Ok before you assume I’m an old, single, bitter hag who has never been in love let me set the record straight. Yes, I do actually have a boyfriend who I’m really happy with. And yes I have grown rather fond of him over the years we’ve been together. But, and this is where we are two different types of people, I do not post that fact all over social media twenty-four-seven. Yes, I’m guilty of doing a soppy post once every now and then, but in all honesty, who isn’t? Shall I tell you when it’s acceptable to get soppy on social media? Their birthday? Go on then. Valentines Day? I’ll allow it. Your anniversary? If it’s a year milestone, yes. If it’s a day, week or month milestone? No. Every single day of the year? Also a no from me.
I’m talking about you people who feel the need to talk about your “perfect relationship” near enough every day. How many sickly selfies, tweets and Facebook posts of a couple licking each others tonsils is one person expected to take? Facebook posts are the worst. Instead of writing an essay full of heart emojis on your significant other’s wall, why not text them? Or better yet, tell them how much you love them to their face next time you see them. It’s you people that make me want to chuck my beloved iPhone at a brick wall every time I check my Facebook feed. I can’t unfriend you because you’re a family friend and I can’t unfollow you because I’m scared you’ll mention something you’ve put on Facebook next time we talk and I won’t have a clue what you’re on about. Do you understand the predicament you’re putting me in?
And I have a theory about you couples as well. If you’re so happy together then why do you spend more time posting about it on social media, then you do seemingly talking to each other? How are you managing to find time to chat, laugh and have lots of sex if you’re constantly needing to check how many likes or retweets your confession of undying love for your partner, gets? Because if any of those things are taking a back seat to your social media antics, you’re doing it wrong. I actually think those who overshare on social media are just trying prove to themselves and others they’re happier than they actually are. But that’s just my opinion…
So please, couples who overshare, for my sanity and everyone else’s on social media, just stop.
An Unknown Sauce