Welcome to Sex With An Unknown Sauce, aka SWAUS.
Whether brief or a tale that’ll take hours to tell, we love to hear your sexual escapades… Got a sex story to share? Tweet us @SauceMagUK and express your interest or submit your story here, and we’ll help take care of the rest.
So I met this girl on a night out in Bournemouth and we swapped numbers, I didn’t really think anything of it until a few days later she text me and asked if I wanted to go for coffee. I had one of those feelings like I’d met her before, or seen her at least, but thought I was just going mad and must have bumped into her in a club before or something. We went on a few dates, we went for dinner, to the cinema and stuff, and then I thought I’d see if she wanted to go back to mine.
Unfortunately, I still lived with my parents at this point, as I was in-between jobs… Anyway, I took her back, and as she walked in the door she made a comment about a painting in our hallway, as she was into art, but it was a really kinda niche artist that did it, so I was surprised she knew who it was, but just ignored it. We went upstairs to my bedroom and started kissing, she was so hot and I just wanted to rip her clothes off so bad. We were in full swing when she suddenly called out “fuck me Matt, yes Matt.” I didn’t want to ruin the moment so I just kinda ignored it, until she kept saying it. Eventually I just kinda slowed down and said “Er, my name is Mark…” to which she awkwardly apologised and we finished. I later found out, I recognised her for a good reason, my brother (Matt) had brought her back from a night out while he was back from Uni for the summer, and I must have caught a glimpse of her leaving the next morning. Thinking back, I remember him telling me about her and how he thought she was dull for liking the same artist our parents had many paintings from…
– Sex With An Unknown (Male) Sauce –