In a time where we are attached to our mobile phones and take longer taking photos of our food for Instagram than we do eating it, sexting has become a strange new thing that everyone is familiar with. You can be walking down the road, sat on the toilet, or even in the middle of a lecture surrounded by 60+ other students who are all wishing they’d stayed in bed, and nobody has any idea what emojis you’re sending as you try to be sexy. After all, telling someone what you’d like to do to them in person can be awkward and seem embarrassing, and instead we turn to texting and WhatsApp to express our deepest and often darkest sexual desires.
Regardless of my personal opinions on the matter, sexting is a part of modern day dating. Few of us meet and continue to date after bumping into one another in a bar or a coffee shop, and instead we turn to apps that are ready and waiting in our pockets to find us ‘true love’. While we may consider ourselves single and ready to mingle, or truly committed to finding a partner in crime, sexting often crops up in the most unlikely of scenarios. Texting is full of innuendos and teasing subjects that can be quickly turned into a dirty conversation that only yourself and the receiver of your saucy messages are aware of. We can sext on the way to the work, we can sext on the way back. The options are limitless.
But is this affecting our sex lives? Of course it must be. We are sooner aware of what the other person ‘is into’ after exchanging a few naughty texts here and there. We’ll soon know if they’re a likely sexual match or if we’re heading for boredom. If your sexual tastes are a little kinky, testing the water early on in the form of sexting can often cut out the awkward, “so, what do you like…” type conversations. Nobody really likes those, do they? Unlike watching porn or reading erotica (pah, read…), sexting is far more personal and allows us to open up in a whole new way across a medium that can hide any awkward blushes. Adding a wink on the end of a text message can quickly change all meaning, and innuendos by text can be discarded far quicker than an off the cuff comment in person.
Receiving a long text from the person you’re interested in telling you what they’d rather be doing to you while they’re stuck at work is definitely a way to brighten up a food shop or a trip to the doctors. Chuckling to yourself at often the most cringe-worthy of sexts comes naturally to us… But is it killing all romance and sex? Romance maybe, slightly. But while we may not seem grown up enough to discuss these things in person, it’s better to be talking about it (even if it is by text) rather than ignoring the scantily-dressed elephant in the room.
Be warned: Autocorrect is a sexting killer. So get ducked. You ducker.